Painting.

Yesterday I hung out with Cailie and Nolle. It was so refreshing to spend some time with those girls. They give me such clarity and bring me so much happiness.

Cailie was painting a picture for her friend Jason. And so she had bought lots of paints and canvases, and invited Nib and I to paint with her. I only used a little tiny canvas, because I was a bit overwhelmed with the idea of painting for the first time in over a year. But let me tell you.


I finally found that missing puzzle piece of myself that I've been looking for everywhere. My inner artist was dying, and that's really who I am. I have an artist's soul. I speak my mind too often, I feel too deeply, and I'm easily seduced into whatever emotion I'm feeling that day.

But to paint. For the first time in a YEAR.

Was the most refreshing thing I've ever done. I didn't paint anything special. Just a sunflower, but the very smell of the paint made me feel like myself.

I missed the days where I was covered in paint because I had been painting half the night making up a project. I missed the soft music that I played, and the backache from bending over to paint on my floor. I missed it so so much.

I even missed having little flecks of paint in my hair.


I've been making jewelry. And that's helped my inner artist a lot. I feel good at something, and it's was nice to have a break.

But want to know the best part? I get to have both!

I'm even thinking about majoring in art again!!! (I wouldn't make any artist, but hey! I might be happy.)



Just kidding. I'm still planning on majoring in social work. BUT! I would love to incorporate art therapy someday.



Because that's what painting is for me. It's the deepest form of healing that I have access to. I can tap into the parts of my heart that are still hurting, or sad. I can feel the deepest happiness I've ever experience. I can help myself.






I'm an artist. That's really the largest part of my identity.

And I'm so happy to have it back.