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7.11.10

It's just not that simple...


I wish it were as simple as whispering "I love you" into your ear, and then you'd fall madly in love with me, and never want to leave my side.
I wish it were as simple, as going into a time machine, setting the date, changing the occurances, and never having to go through quiet suffering.
I wish it were as simple, as letting things go. Letting go of grudges, moving on in my life, and never having to remember anything.
I wish it were as simple, as saying I'm sorry, I was wrong. And you apologizing to, and going back, to whatever it was that we had, but now there's school, work, and a weird sense of everything else.
I wish it were as simple, as trusting in God. Truly believing that everything happened for a reason, and that sometimes, for whatever reason, bad things happen to good people, and that it's just the way it is.
I wish it were as simple as giving someone a hug, and taking all their pain and suffering far away from them.
Nothing is simple. Simplicity is bliss, but that's why we're here, because earth is a massive hellhole that we call home, until we die, and move onto another life, or simply just die.
There's nothing simple about being alive, and living through everything that we have thrown at us. I don't understand why things are the way that they are most of the time. Granted, I'm human.
But Suzanna has a boyfriend, and never has time for me anymore. Nina never answers my calls, or when she does, she's busy. She has her own life, I get that, but what happened to our weekends? Zac? Where did you go? Our friendship/relationship/whatever in the hell that we had was screwy and dysfunctional, bit it was a constant in my life. Jesse...We just don't know each other that well. Obviously we're in the "getting to know you stages" But we're both shy. Unless it has to do with music. WHAT IF I'M SICK OF MUSIC????!!!! Not that I am. But we have a language. It's something that only a piano can speak. Chopin, Mendelssohn, Beethoven, Debussy, it makes sense to us, but in a sense, it's like we have a language barrier. It's so much simpler if we could just play everything we had to say. Dommy? What happened? Best? friends. Right. I love Suzee, and it's easy to talk to her, but I know there's something she's containing that's bothering her, and I wish I could help.
Superman isn't real. Sorry to break someone's dreams. But there's no such thing as being invincible. What about heart break? What about death? Are we all immune to that now? Living a world of plastic surgery, and scandal? What about natural disasters, and unity? What is the price of peace? Is it the cost of a couple's only son fighting for our freedom, so later we can all worry about our prada bags?
There's so much wrong, but so much right. But for whatever reason, not a lot of change. There's nothing simple in our world. Between PETA destroying the name of animal right extremists that do it the right way (I'm sorry but the premise: You should be vegan because it better, sucks. There were no statistics that backed anything up. Poorly written article.) Hollywood degrading the worth of a woman (Bad girls club, Jersey shore....), Every other teenager getting knocked up and broadcasted (16 and pregnant, teen mom) What is there to believe?
Do we not have the intelligence to choose things for ourselves anymore? Is there no sense of our own personal battles, and destinies?
Our world just isn't that simple.

2 comments:

  1. wow.... did you take a breath yet? sometimes its good just to stand back and take a breath instead of looking at everything wrong. That is way too exhausting! things only get more complicated as life goes on... so ride the good stuff.

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